“People think it must be fun to be a super genius, but they don't realize how hard it is to put up with all the idiots in the world.”

“Some people think the stars must look closer from up here. They don't. When you're up here, you realize how distant they really are—how impossible to reach.”

“People can be teachers and idiots; they can be philosophers and idiots; they can be politicians and idiots... in fact I think they have to be... a genius can be an idiot. The world is largely run for and by idiots; it is no great handicap in life and in certain areas is actually a distinct advantage and even a prerequisite for advancement.”

“I think that when people hear the president [George W. Bush] speak, frankly, they think he's really stupid. But what people don't realize is that there's a genius behind that stupidity, and that genius is Harlan McCraney.”

“I didn't care if he was a genius or a fucking idiot, he was rotting away, and it wasn't fun to watch.”

“More sports for everyone, group spirit, fun and you don't have to think, eh? Organize and organize and superorganize super-super sports. More cartoons in books. More pictures. The mind drinks less and less.”