“You know you're getting old when the candles cost more than the cake.”

“I don't feel old. I don't feel anything till noon. That's when it's time for my nap.”

“My idea of Christmas, whether old-fashioned or modern, is very simple: loving others. Come to think of it, why do we have to wait for Christmas to do that?”

“When she started to play, Steinway came down personally and rubbed his name off the piano. ”

“When we recall Christmas past, we usually find that the simplest things - not the great occasions - give off the greatest glow of happiness.”

“A bank is a place that will lend you money if you can prove that you don't need it.”

“A sense of humor is good for you. Have you ever heard of a laughing hyena with heart burn? ”