“What do you do?' she asks, holding out the vest.'What do you do?''What do you do?' she asks, her voice shaking. 'Don't ask me, please. Okay, Clay?''Why not?'She sits on the mattress after I get up. Muriel screams.'Because... I don't know,' she sighs.I look at her and don't feel anything and walk out with my vest.”

“Clay, did you ever love me?"I'm studying a billboard and say that I didn't hear what she said."I asked if you ever loved me?"On the terrace the sun bursts into my eyes and for one blinding moment I see myself clearly. I remember the first time we made love, in the house in Palm Springs, her body tan and wet, lying against cool, white sheets."Don't do this, Blair," I tell her."Just tell me."I don't say anything."Is it such a hard question to answer?"I look at her straight on."Yes or no?""Why?""Damnit, Clay," she sighs."Yeah, sure, I guess.""Don't lie to me.""What in the fuck do you want to hear?""Just tell me," she says, her voice rising."No," I almost shout. "I never did." I almost start to laugh.She draws in a breath and says, "Thank you. That's all I wanted to know." She sips her wine."Did you ever love me?" I ask her back, though by now I can't even care.She pauses. "I thought about it and yeah, I did once. I mean I really did. Everything was all right for a while. You were kind." She looks down and then goes on. "But it was like you weren't there. Oh shit, this isn't going to make any sense." She stops.I look at her, waiting for her to go on, looking up at the billboard. Disappear Here."I don't know if any other person I've been with has been really there, either ... but at least they tried."I finger the menu; put the cigarette out."You never did. Other people made an effort and you just ... It was just beyond you." She takes another sip of her wine. "You were never there. I felt sorry for you for a little while, but then I found it hard to. You're a beautiful boy, Clay, but that's about it."I watch the cars pass by on Sunset."It's hard to feel sorry for someone who doesn't care.""Yeah?" I ask."What do you care about? What makes you happy?""Nothing. Nothing makes me happy. I like nothing," I tell her."Did you ever care about me, Clay?"I don't say anything, look back at the menu."Did you ever care about me?" she asks again."I don't want to care. If I care about things, it'll just be worse, it'll just be another thing to worry about. It's less painful if I don't care.""I cared about you for a little while."I don't say anything.She takes off her sunglasses and finally says, "I'll see you later, Clay." She gets up."Where are you going?" I suddenly don't want to leave Blair here. I almost want to take her back with me."Have to meet someone for lunch.""But what about us?""What about us?" She stands there for a moment, waiting. I keep staring at the billboard until it begins to blur and when my vision becomes clearer I watch as Blair's car glides out of the parking lot and becomes lost in the haze of traffic on Sunset. The waiter comes over and asks, "Is everything okay, sir?"I look up and put my sunglasses on and try to smile. "Yeah.”

“Will you call me before Christmas?' she asks.Maybe.' I pull on my vest, wondering why I even came here in the first place.You've still got my number, don't you?' She reaches for a pad and begins to write it down.Yeah, Blair. I've got your number. I'll get in touch.'I button up my jeans and turn to leave.Clay?'Yeah, Blair.'If I don't see you before Christmas,' she stops. 'Have a good one.'I look at her a moment. 'Hey, you too.'She picks up the stuffed black cat and strokes its head.I step out the door and start to close it.Clay?' she whispers loudly.I stop but don't turn around.'Yeah?'Nothing.”

“But you don't need anything. You have everything,' I tell him.Rip looks at me. 'No I don't.''What?''No I don't.'There's a pause and then I ask, 'Oh, shit, Rip, What don't you have?''I don't have anything to loose.”

“and the girl and I get into her car and drive off into the hills and we go to her room and I take off my clothes and lie on her bed and she goes into the bathroom and I wait a couple of minutes and then she finally comes out, a towel wrapped around her, and sits on the bed and I put my hands on her shoulders, and she says stop it and, after I let her go, she tells me to lean against the headboard and I do and then she takes off the towel and she's naked and she reaches into the drawer by her bed and brings out a tube of Bain De Soleil and she hands it to me and then she reaches into the drawer and brings out a pair of Wayfarer sunglasses and she tells me to put them on and I do. And she takes the tube of suntan lotion form me and squeezes some onto her fingers and then touches herself and motions for me to do the same, and I do. After a while I stop and reach over to her and she stops me and says no, and then places my hand back on myself and her hand begins again and after this goes on for a while I tell her that I'm going to come and she tells me to hold on a minute and that she's almost there and she begins to move her hand faster, spreading her legs wider, leaning back against the pillows, and I take the sunglasses off and she tells me to put them back on and I put them back on and it stings when I come and then I guess she comes too. Bowie's on the stereo and she gets up, flushed, and turns the stereo off and turns on MTV. I lie there, naked, sunglasses still on and she hands me a box of Kleenex. I wipe myself off then look through a Vogue that's lying by the side of the bed. She puts a robe on and stares at me. I can hear thunder in the distance and it begins to rain harder. She lights a cigarette and I start to dress ....”

“Do you know what Ed Gein said about women?"[...]"'When I see a pretty girl walking down the street I think two things. One part of me wants to take her out and talk to her and be real nice and sweet and treat her right.'" I stop finish my J&B in one swallow."What does the other part of him think?" Hamlin asks tentatively."What her head would look like on a stick”

“but I don't want to wear a condom because I don't feel anything," and she says calmly... glaring at me,"If you don't use one you're not going to feel anything anyway.”