“Forgive me if I don't take relationship advice from a dead teenager missing her vagina.”

“My mom once told me that a good relationship isn't where the other person makes you feel better, but where they make *you* better.”

“Gert: What... what just happened?Chase: I don't know, but guess who totally stole Cookie Monster's glasses!Gert: Whew, for a second there, I was worried we almost learned something.Chase: Ooo, look at me! I'm a big fluffy nerd!”

“They hurt you. You hurt 'em back. Or maybe it is the other way around. Whatever. Someday you might find a way to forgive each other. But it won't be like it used to 'cause that pain never really goes away.”

“Come back with a healthy monkey, or don't come back at all.”

“Gert: Wake me when the fight scene's over. Kitty Pryde: Oy, tell me about it. Hey, I'm Kitty. You the token pacifist of your group? Gert: Not exactly. Pacifists are like vegans, I'm more of a vegetarian. I enjoy fish and occasional maulings.”

“…though queens are a particular obsession of mine. I’m not speaking of European sovereigns, mind you, but that most glorious force of the chessboard. Did you know her square was originally occupied by a male “vizier,” able to advance only one meager diagonal step per move? But during the reign of the great female monarchs, this piece metamorphosed into a “queen,” and her power grew commensurate with her title. Only then did the game become something more— A mental odyssey that helped reshape the world.”