“I apply for a new job twice a week, every week. I am applying for the position of millionaire but so far my numbers haven't come up.”

“But instead I am applying for a job as an elf. Even worse than applying is the very real possibility that I will not be hired, that I couldn't even find work as an elf. That's when you know you're a failure.”

“How long does it have to go on? This punishment? Haven't I done time enough, haven't I served my term? can't I apply for a-pardon?”

“I am trying to absorb the situation and would like to do my absorption in peace. In general, I prefer to record all traumas and save them for later, playing them over and over so they can haunt me for a disproportionate number of weeks to come. It’s very healthy.”

“This looks like a job for inadvisably applied magic if ever I saw one.”

“Here's to responsibility," he toasted. "Twice a week.""And recklessness every day in between," I emphasized.He grinned and touched his can to mine.”