“No, no! Sit down! I'll do the dishes. After nine and a half months of pregnancy, 26 hours of labor, and 18 stitches, you don't have to do a damn thing around here!”

“I'll bet you anything you like that half an hour after they have met, they will be calling each other sister.Women only do that when they have called each other a lot of other things first.”

“To begin perfect happiness at the respective ages of 26 and 18 is to do pretty well”

“You can't do that kind of thing normally, but normal dumped without a note nearly a month ago. These days, I'll happily set fire to a bridge the second after I've crossed it - I don't plan on being around for the consequences to catch up with me.”

“I sit here very respectfully to listen to you. If what you want to do is put on a show and giggle every time I talk, well then I have no interest in answering your question. So if you'd like to conduct a respectful conversation, I'm happy to do it. If you don't, sit down and I'll answer the next question. What's your choice?”

“Holy shit, are you positive?""As a pregnancy test a month after prom.”