“No friend of my parents is a pervert. It's physiologically impossible.”

“My one challenge with the support group that I'd become involved with on campus is that the people seem to spend as much time talking about their ill-begotten pasts as their promising futures. It's as if people are drawn to looking back. They can't move on until it all makes sense. Humbly submitted: It never does.”

“The university doesn't THINK; the university KNOWS. If the university says it's Thursday, then it's Thursday.”

“It's fine to be insane as long as you keep it to yourself.”

“My belief in ghosts swings with the wind. But my belief that the cemetery felt happy and not sad—I've never changed my mind about that.”

“Complete happiness can look so much like complete terror that its hard to tell them apart.”

“You're making it sound like it's more dangerous to have a slightly weird family, than a totally weird family.”