“Things don't have to be sane when they're normal.”

“When you go into a room, you knock first. If you start asking people questions and they start tilting back in their chairs, it means they don't want to talk about it. It means if you look at something on their computer screens, they're likely to knock your brains out with a baseball bat.”

“But not hurting people and knowing how to get along with people, ... they're different.”

“I don't know if anybody thinks of themselves as bad. We all have excuses.”

“Don't tell people you care about them when all you really care about is getting your own way.”

“You can almost believe what you know is not true when you really have to.”

“Why is it that everyone loves to see the rich person get flushed down the toilet? Why is it people will spend four dollars to buy a magazine just so they can read about some Hollywood star's divorce? Or arrest? Or bad luck? I have no idea what Hollywood crimes have actually been told truthfully, but at least I have the brains to say I don't know.”