“At a rear window I hear the heart-rendering cries of my captive kind, plus a lot of yammering from the idiotic dogs, who will raise about the same ruckus for a simple rabies shot as they would for the end of the world.--Midnight Louie”

“In the end, what i have come to believe about God is simple. It's like this - I used to have this really great dog. She came from the pound. She was a mixture of about ten different breeds, but seemed to have inherited the finest features of them all. She was brown. When people asked me, "What kind of dog is that?" I would always give the same answer: "She's a brown dog." Similarly, when the question is raised, "What kind of God do you believe in?" my answer is easy: "I believe in a magnificent God.”

“What kind of dog is that?" I would always give the same answer: "She's a brown dog." Similarly, when the question is raised, "What kind of God do you believe in?" my answer is easy: "I believe in a magnificent God.”

“What if one out of every three multinational corporation CEO's were raped every year? Don't you think that would raise a kind of ruckus?”

“Louie liked watching rain - it was always so sad and interesting at the same time, like sitting with a friend who was crying.”

“Actually, no, I wasn't thinking about STDs." Because apparently, I'm an idiot. Turns out, I was more worried about babies than I was rabies.”