“I actually thought you would be kind," said the vampire."Go away!" screamed Devnee.He did not answer."I didn't have to be kind," Devnee told him. "Victoria was kind for me."He laughed."No one can be kind for you, my dear," said the vampire. "But I don't mind, of course. I have you now. There's no escape, my dear. You and I, Devnee Fountain, are a team.”

“My kind [vampires] does not surprise easily," he said. "You surprised me, this morning. I have thus used up my full quota of shock and consternation for some interval."I stared at him. "You made a *joke*.""I have heard this kind of thing may happen...”

“You bit me on the neck? What kind of a sorry-ass vampire wannabe are you, anyhow?”I grabbed for my dirt-covered purse that lay by my feet. I kept a can of pepper spray in it for protection, or at least I used to. Did I still have it? Did those things have an expiration date? Didn’t matter. If I had to, I’d just use it to bash him over the head.I’m not a wannabe.” He actually had the audacity to look insulted. “I am a vampire.”Psycho, I thought. Total psycho.”

“Hey, have you ever heard of the Alchemists? " "Sure, " he said."Of course you have. " "Why? Did you run into them? " "Kind of. " "What'd you do? " "Why do you think I did anything? " He laughed. "Alchemists only show up when trouble happens, and you bring trouble wherever you go. Be careful, though. They're religious nuts." "That's kind of extreme," I said. "Just don't let them convert you." He winked. "I like you being the sinner you are.”

“What kind of husband would I be if I bet against my own marriage?'I smiled. 'The stupid kind. Didn't you listen to your dad when he told you not to bet against me?”

“What kind of monster are you anyway? You should be more humane, Gennady!""I was humane when I was alive," said the vampire.”