“It doesn’t bother you that your canine brethren are being paraded around show rings like slaves?”“My canine brethren?” I said. “I don’thave any canine brethren.”“How can you say that! You’re a werewolf.”“That’s right. I’m a werewolf, not a poodle. What makes you think I have any kinship with dogs?”

“I was under the impression that werewolf packs were not meant to be run by committee.""Yeah," I said. "But I dont want to be like all those other werewolves, you know?""Says the werewolf named Kitty.""It's too late to change my name now," I grumbled.”

“I'm a werewolf trapped in a human body.""Well, yeah, that's kind of the definition.""No, really. I'm trapped.""Oh? When was the last time you shape-shifted?""That's just it - I've never shape-shifted.""So you're not really a werewolf.""Not yet. But I was meant to be one, I just know it. How do I get a werewolf to attack me?"Stand in the middle of a forest under a full moon with a raw steak tied to your face, holding a sign that says, 'Eat me; I'm stupid'?”

“So is he cute? Good-looking, I mean? Because I can’t really tell with guys, and it looked like you two might have hit it off.” I grinned at him. “Jealous?” He grinned right back. “That’s a trick question. If I say yes you’ll accuse me of being paranoid and unreasonable, and if I say no you’ll make some defensive crack about how I don’t think you’re worth getting jealous over.” This was what I got for hooking up with a lawyer.”

“Hey, Cormac. You ever have to deal with a PMSing werewolf?”

“So, Cormac, have you ever dealt with a PMSing werewolf?'No.'Well, it's a real bitch...”

“It’s my husband. I think— I think he’s a zombie.” I smiled. “Believe it or not, I get this one a lot. Can you describe his behavior? Why do you think he’s a zombie?” She huffed. “He doesn’t do anything! He sits on the sofa all day watching TV and that’s it.”