“That’s why girls have boyfriends. So you have someone to take you to boring functions.”

“Why does he have to be my boyfriend? Are you inferior if you don't have a boyfriend? Why does everybody have to be in love with somebody?”

“He laughed again. “Not boring and not dumb. That’s so much better than your boyfriend who both bored me and was dumb. To be honest I don’t know what you saw in him.” “Ex. Ex-boyfriend ” she said. “I swear to God I’m never going to live that down.”

“So let me see-you've got a boyfriend, a not boyfriend, and a secret admirer." He shook his head at me. "Girl, no wonder someone tried to run you down.”

“Maybe that’s why his lovers hadn’t worked out so far. Maybe before you got someone who would fight to have you, you had to be ready to kill or die for them first.”

“You should have to pass an IQ test before you breed. You have to take a driving test to operate vehicles and an SAT test to get into college. So why don’t you have to take some sort of test before you give birth to children? When I am President, that’s the first rule I will institute.”