“You're the most annoying girl on the planet. You make me want to throw myself off a bridge. And, unfortunately, I am one hundred percent, head-over-heels, crazy in love with you.”

“You were just too nice to tell me to buzz off.""I did tell you to buzz off," he pointed out. "Several times.""I'm not the best with feedback.”

“Sheets of flowing raven-black hair...all wrapped up in that saccharin sweetness you only find in church-ladies and Girl Scout moms. It was enough to make a girl sprint to the nearest shopping mall for a free makeover.”

“You can't deny we work well together. I could be your sidekick, if you want. Like Superman and Lois Lane. Or Peter Pan and Tinker Bell.""Tinker Bell isn't menacing.""Which proves how much you need me," I insisted. "Fairies are terrifying."He sat up straighter and dusted off his pants. "Fairies don't exist. Neither do Graymasons.""That's what humans say about vampires and werewolves," I argued. "So we're agreed.”

“Dizziness?""No.""Nausea? Vomiting? Diarrhea?""No, no, and yuck," I said. "Dr. G, can I please be excused?""Not yet. How many fingers am I holding up?""Eleven.""Amelie."I scowled. (...) "Sir, I'm fine. Just let me go to class. Please?"Gunderman unhooked the blood pressure cuff from my arm and looked at me like I'd asked to borrow his credit card. "Young the lady, the fact you want to go to class gives me definite cause for concern.”

“I could see his lips forming the word, Hey, baby. Want to party?Yeesh. After a hundred thousand years of verbal evolution, could a guy not produce a better pick up line than that?”

“Just because a guy wears glasses and smiles at you doesn't mean he's nice." Lisa dug around in her purse for a tube of lip-gloss. "Maybe he's a visually impaired cannibal. Did you ever think of that? Like one of those serial killers you love so much.""I don't love serial killers," Katie argued, defensive. "Not romantically, at least.”