“We drive down the road in complete silence for a few miles listening to 50 Cent. As soon as he tells us that he's into having sex, he ain't into making love, Casey turns the volume down and begins telling me the following information: " I love you so much. We're going to have the best life together. I can't wait." Every word she says makes me feel a little more like faking a stroke and pretending to lose all memory of who I was, but it's not until she looks me in the eye and says in all seriousness, "You're my soul mate," that I realize I am not going to marry her.”

“Every word she says makes me feel a little more like faking a stroke and pretending to lose all memory of who I was.”

“People can be cruel,' he says with a sympathetic look that makes me trust him even more. And right then I realize that he is not writing down all my words in a file, which I really appreciate, let me tell you.”

“Damn, damn, damn," she said. "I never said why I like you, and now I have to go.""That's okay," he said."It's because you're kind," she said. "And because you get all my jokes...""Okay." He laughed."And you're smarter than I am.""I am not.""And you look like a protagonist." She was talking as fast as she could think. "You look like the person who wins in the end. You're so pretty, and so good. You have magic eyes," she whispered. "And you make me feel like a cannibal.""You're crazy.""I have to go." She leaned over so the receiver was close to the base."Eleanor - wait," Park said. She could hear her dad in the kitchen and her heartbeat everywhere."Eleanor - wait - I love you.”

“No. You can't. And I can't do anything either, about my life, to change it, make it better, make me feel better about it. Like it better, make it work. But I can stop it. Shut it down, turn it off like the radio when there's nothing on I want to listen to. It's all I really have that belongs to me and I'm going to say what happens to it. And it's going to stop. And I'm going to stop it. So. Let's just have a good time.”

“I know what I have to say. I think of Hillary's advice, how she has been telling me to say something all along. But I am not doing this for her. This is for me. I formulate the sentences, words that have been ringing in my head all summer."I want to be with you, Dex" I say steadily. "Cancel the wedding. Be with me."There it is. After two months of waiting, a lifetime of passivity, everything is on the line. I feel relieved and liberated and changed. I am a woman who expects happiness. I deserve happiness. Surely he will make me happy.Dex inhales, on the verge of responding."Don't," I say, shaking my head. "Please don't talk to me agian unless it's to tell me that the wedding is off. We have nothing more to discuss until then."Our eyes lock. Neither of us blinks for a minute or more. And then, for the first time, I beat Dex in a staring contest. ”