“Adults tend to be more understanding and accepting of differences than teenagers. The important thing is to find a group that your adult child is personally interested in being a part of, and then acting on the assumption that he has the right to be there and that he will fit right in.”

“He was only a child, doing what adults led him to do; but somewhere in his heart he knew that even a child is a real person, that a child's acts are real acts, that even a child's play is not without moral context.”

“I find it really offensive when people say that the emotional experiences of teenagers are less real or less important than those of adults.”

“In families like Fred's, much of a child's identity and his illusions of safety depend on feeling enmeshed. He develops a need to be a part of other people and to have them be a part of him. He can't stand the thought of being cast out. This need for enmeshment carries right into adult relationships.”

“Love is more about being the right person than finding the right person.”

“He seemed convinced that children's questions were much more important than those of an adult. He preferred smart questions to smart answers.”