“Beauty tips. How to look younger: Don't be born so soon.”

“Travel tips: How to avoid carsickness, seasickness and airsickness... Be careful what you eat. And stay home.”

“I feel sorry for little babies... When a little baby is born into this cold world, he's confused! He's frightened! He needs something to cheer him up... The way I see it, as soon as a baby is born, he should be issued a banjo!”

“Schroeder, do you think I'm beautiful?""I think you're the most beautiful girl the world has ever known...""You hate me, don't you?”

“You mean you're going to send the same form letter to the Great Pumpkin, Santa Claus and the Easter Bunny?""Why not? These guys get so much mail they can't possibly tell the difference... I bet they don't even read the letters themselves! How could they?! The trouble with you, Charlie Brown, is you don't understand how these big organizations work!”

“I have a feeling that this is going to be a good year.""What makes you think so?""I don't know... It just has all the appearances of a good year.""Have you looked in all the corners?”

“More health tips: Eat lots of fruits and vegetables. Get plenty of rest. And learn to duck.”