“I fall in love with any girl who smells of library paste.”

“I just don't know how to write a love letter. What can you say to a girl that shows you really like her?""How about, enclosed please find a cookie?”

“Exercise is a dirty word. Every time I hear it I wash my mouth out with chocolate.”

“Sometimes I lie awake at night and I ask, "Why me?", then a voice answers "Nothing personal, your name just happened to come up.”

“I come from a long line of generations!”

“There are three things I have learned never to discuss with people... Religion, Politics, and The Great Pumpkin. ”

“Sometimes, when you walk by the homeof the girl you love, you can see her standing by the window... She waves at you, and you wave back... But it's her grandmother...”