“The company wants to sell you more shampoo, your friend doesn't, so she gets more trust points.”

“Have you ever put finger, algea-filled lake-water, or shampoo in there? Yeah, that gets your eyes screaming in pain pretty quick, doesn't it? Unless you're using baby No More Tears shampoo, of course, in which case feel free to lather your eyeballs right on up, no worries.”

“You don't have to fear your own company being perceived as human. You want it. People don't trust companies; they trust people.”

“When you get lost in a really strange place, nothing is more comforting than found your friend whom you trust and can show the way.”

“People in groups are like sheep. Like, when your very best friend is surrounded by other people, she cares more about what everybody else thinks that she cares about you. The more people there are, the more they act like animals."That doesn't make sense.""Sure it does. Have you ever heard of two guys getting in a fistfight when there's nobody around to watch? It never happens. It takes a crowd to bring out the beast. You can't trust anybody when you're not alone with them. Anybody. You have to know the boundaries.”

“Miz Beauty does not speak. You've got to discover her erogenous zones, her favorite subjects of conversation, her sign, all on your own. Meanwhile, Miz Piggy's coming like an express train. She doesn't get it every day. And she's hell-bent to make the most of it. She wants more, more, more.”