“My mother wanted to be Betty Boop. Betty Boop was independent. Betty Boop was sexy. Betty Boop really had her shit together, you know?”
“Betty inhales sharply, 'It's just I thought I had lost you forever.'Oh, Betty, don't you know there's no such thing as forever?”
“Betty was a great shark of a woman. Men died in her wake.”
“There is nothing like Betty Ford sex.”
“Call her Betty Fucking Crocker, because the cake was so going to be worth the bake.”
“She's talking about condominiums," my friend Betty Searle called up to say one day. "Obviously she's involved with someone."Are you sure?" I said.Of course I'm sure," said Betty. "The question is who." She thought for a minute. "Maybe it's Senator Campbell," she said. "He's talking condominiums, too."Senators always talk about condominiums," I said. That's true," said Betty.”