“I do what I can do when I can do it.”

“Only a woman can make you feel wrong for doing something right.”

“Do you know?What the fuck do women want?l know what you want: everything.”

“Only dumb people try to impress smart people. Smart people just do what they do.”

“I used to work at McDonald's making minimum wage. You know what that means when someone pays you minimum wage? You know what your boss was trying to say? "Hey if I could pay you less, I would, but it's against the law.”

“I don't get high, but sometimes I wish I did. That way, when I messed up in life I would have an excuse. But right now there's no rehab for stupidity. ”

“If you can keep your son off the pipe and your daughter off the pole, you're ahead of the game.”