“You just like to piss me off,” Jack said.“Well, there’s that. On the other hand, we’ll find out really fast just how much of a bastard you’re going to be to live with—with your woman around. You get out of line, and I’ll have to take you out behind the barn.”“We don’t have a barn.”“I told you we needed a barn, damn it,” Ken said. “You had to have a shop. It doesn’t sound the same saying I’m taking you out behind the shop.”

“I think we may have started this conversation off on the wrong foot," Robert said finally. In fact, if the conversation had been animate, the merciful thing to do would have been to take it out behind the barn and shoot it.”

“Then they have the audacity to go shopping and pick out their own gifts. I want to know who the first person was who said this was okay. After spending all that money on a bachelorette weekend, a shower, and often a flight across the country, they expect you to go to Williams Sonoma or Pottery Barn and do research? Then they send you a thank-you note applauding you for such a thoughtful gift. They're the one who picked it out!”

“We’re both drunk,”“This isn’t right,” he said.“I want you.”“I need you to say it,” he said.“I’ll say whatever you want.”“Then say that you belong to me. Say that you’ll take me back. I won’t do this unless we’re together.”“We’ve never really been apart, have we?” “I need to hear you say it. I need to know you’re mine.”“I’ve been yours since the second we met.”“Say it again,”he said.“I’m yours,” I breathed. Every nerve, inside and out ached for more. “I don’t ever want to be apart from you again.”“Promise me,”“I love you. I’ll love you forever.”

“Well, you’re just going to have to take a leap of faith,” he said.“I think I can do that,” she said. “If you’re there to catch me.”“I’m here,” he said. “I haven’t let you down yet, have I?”She put her hand against his face. “No, Jack. You sure haven’t.”

“I'm a doctor of cowshit, pigshit, and chickenshit.....when you doctors figure out what you want, you'll find me out in the barn shoveling my thesis.”