“You learned several forms of martial arts.""yes, and for the most part, because I was doing something physical and most of my instructors enjoyed what they were doing, it was fun. Later, as I got older and they were serious about training me, I was faster than the instructors, and some of them would get angry.""Honey, that's entirely understandable. You're barely five feet tall, and you can't weigh a hundred pounds. To make matters worse, you're a girl. Kicking some man's butt is not ladylike.”

“Learning science is not just learning facts, or even procedures. Science is a discourse-a way of conversing-with an epistemological frame:how to we know? Why do we think so?And I tell that that, yes, you can do this by yourself-have a conversation-but you have to learn to do it first. And its' much easier to learn to do it with a peer rather than an instructor. With an instructor you expect them to "know" the answer and, even if they won't give it to you directly, you expect them to be right. In a science dialog none of you "know" what's right. You're all trying to figure it out.”

“I'm serious. They'll call me a pussy.""And if you help them, I'll call you a dick. So no matter what you do, you're going to be some form of genitalia.”

“Aren’t they supposed to be hiring someone else to train me full-time anyway?”“Yes,” he said, getting up and pulling her to her feet along with him,“ and I’m worried that if you get into the habit of making out with your instructors, you’ll wind up making out with him, too.”“ Don’t be sexist. They could find me a female instructor.”“In that case you have my permission to make out with her, as long as I can watch.”

“I love you," she said. "You made me fall in love with you. I don't care how tall you are or what color your hair is-I care about you. You make me laugh. You're smart. You're gentle. And you're real, you're a real person, not some jock with a facade that's going to fall apart when I get to know him. I know you already, and I love you, you idiot. I don't care what you do with toilet paper.”

“My biggest anxiety about becoming a therapist is feeling that I am inadequate. My instructors reassure me that this is a normal feeling, that many therapists experience this in their first year or two of training, and that we’re not expected to be perfect. But it doesn’t make any difference—it remains my biggest anxiety. I believe it’s because I was always second best in my family of origin. No matter what I did, my sister was always smarter...more creative. I learned to feel really uncomfortable whenever I wasn’t in complete command and didn’t know just exactly what I was supposed to do. So, even though some part of me knows that I’m really not inadequate, it still churns my stomach when I am not good at something right away.”