“I'm a minicamp body in 102-degree heat getting screamed at by the only other man my size: a middle-aged receivers coach they call Bow Wow.”

“...and motioned me toward a spot next to a middle-aged Moroi in a very formal and very designer black suit. The suit screamed, I'm sorry the queen is dead, and I'm going to look fashionable while showing my grief”

“Do I have to make a poster and scream Ryan, Ryan?" I kidded."The only time I want to hear you scream my name is when I'm making love to you. Although you did call me God the other night. That's acceptable, too.”

“The Middle Ages hangs over history's belt like a beer belly. It is too late now for aerobic dancing or cottage cheese lunches to reduce the Middle Ages. History will have to wear size 48 shorts forever.”

“Ramming it up the middle only works if you soften the defenses up a little first," the coach said.”

“Meow says the cat ,quack says the duck , Bow wow wow says the dog !Grrrr!”