“You know, he doesn't have to be the only one bopped in the noggin when noggin-boppin' time rolls around.”

“One day the good times had to keep on rolling, and all of life's horseshit would turn to circuses.”

“It's like time travel only, you know, slower...”

“Pondering is a little like considering and a little like thinking, but looser. To ponder, one must let the facts roll around the rim of the mind's roulette wheel, coming to settle in whichever slot they feed pulled to.”

“She have to go pick up prescription, so I watch Sophie for short time. And tiny bears are happy when I go in bathroom.""Hamsters, Mrs. Korjev, not bears." .... "I've got her now," Charlie said. "One of you stay with her while I get rid of the H-A-M-S-T-E-R-S.""He mean the tiny bears.”

“In fact, amid all the musical laments over not having a heart, a brain, or the nerve, did anyone notice that they didn’t have a penis among them? I think it would have shown on the Lion and the Tin Man, and when the Scarecrow has his pants destuffed, you don’t see a flying monkey waving an errant straw Johnson around anywhere, doI think I know what song I’d be singing: Oh, I would while away the hours, Wanking in the flowers, my heart all full of song, I’d be gilding all the lilies as I waved about my willie If I only had a schlong.”

“I've got to think that that was unethical," Joshua said."Josh, faking demonic possession is like a mustard seed.""How is it like a mustard seed?""You don't know, do you? Doesn't seem at all like a mustard seed, does it? Now you see how we all feel when you liken things unto a mustard seed? Huh?”