“Just for the record, how I feel right now is very terrific.”

“If you died right now, how would you feel about your life?”

“It's nice to see something more pathetic than I feel right now.”

“There’s that fallen heart feeling that you rushed right through the moments where you should’ve been paying attention. Well, get used to that feeling. That’s how your whole life will feel some day. This is all practice. None of this matters. We’re just warming up.”

“Just for the record, the weather today is bitter with occasional fits of jealous rage.”

“Just for the record, knowing when people are only pretending to like you isn't such a great skill to have.”

“Just for the record, she still loves you. She wouldn't bother to torture you if she didn't. ”