“No shit, there's worse ways to be dead than dying.”

“There's worse that people can steal from you than money.”

“Trust me, the being-dead part is much easier than the dying part. If you can watch much television, then being dead will be a cinch. Actually, watching television and surfing the Internet are really excellent practice for being dead.”

“There are worse things you can do to the people you love than kill them. The regular way is just to watch the world do it. Just read the newspaper.”

“There's still a thousand places I haven't gone to die.”

“Sometimes your best way to deal with shit is not to hold yourself as such a precious little prize.”

“There's a terrible dark joy when the only person who knows all your secrets is finally dead.”