“Go ahead then. Might as well wipe your ass with a doomed office romance before you flush your career down the toilet. You know it'll happen.”

“Encouragement from any source is like a drop of rain upon a parched desert. Thanks to all the many others who rained on me when I needed it, and even when I foolishly thought I didn't.(acknowledgements in The P.U.R.E.)”

“Why can't I be admitted to the ... bosom of the operation?" I leaned toward him but almost started to laugh because "bosom" was such a funny word and my innuendo was more Tina Fey than Angelina Jolie.”

“Everybody does stupid things in life. Some of us more than others. You think you're going to get away with it. Or one or both of you just stop thinking. But it happens. And when it does, you can keep drinking it like poison, or you can put it behind you and go make the most of the rest of your life.”

“You can try to avoid getting hurt six ways from Sunday, but it still might happen.”

“You are a man. You are an average, lazy, boring, cowardly, woman-fearing man. Without me, that's what you would have kept on being, ad nauseam. But I made you into something. You were the best man you've ever been with me. And you know it. The only time in your life you've ever liked yourself was pretending to be someone I might like.”

“Maybe if the right person floats into your life, you have to jump in with both feet and try to make it work before the tide turns.”