“Are you calling me a weirdo? Highest honor I can bestow.”

“Vic nudged my elbow with his. "You and me are still friends, right? You guys get a joint custody in the divorce. Generous visitations rights.""Divorce?" Despite myself, I laughed. Only Vic could call the aftermath of a bad first date a divorce. We hadn't exactly been friends beforehand, so "still" was an exaggeration, but it would've been mean to point that out. Besides, I liked Vic. "We're still friends.""Excellent. The weirdos have to stick together around here.""Are you calling me a weirdo?""Highest honor I can bestow.”

“To have a child is the greatest honor and responsibility that can be bestowed upon any living being.”

“My eyes widened as I looked at him. 'Then you bit me, you weirdo.”

“Total?" I called. He looked up alertly, then ran over to me, small pink tongue hanging out.Total?" I said when he was close. "Can you talk?"He flopped down on the grass, panting slightly. "Yeah. So?"Jeezum. I mean, mutant weirdos are nothing new to me, you know? But a talking dog?”

“The wounds received in battle bestow honor, they do not take it away...”