“Feel free to look around, but being as though there aren't any people eighteen or older here, stay off the bed. I'm not allowed to get pregnant this weekend.”

“Are you allowed to get pregnant yet?”I laugh. “Nope. Not this weekend. Besides, you have to kiss a girl before you can knock her up.”“Did someone not have sex education when she was homeschooled?” he says. “Because I could totally knock you up without ever kissing you. Want me to show you?”

“And while I could sit here and feel sorry for myself, wondering why all of this happened to me..I'm not going to do it. I'm not going to wish for a perfect life. The things that knock you down in life are tests, forcing you to make a choice between giving in and remaining on the ground or wiping the dirt off and standing up even taller than you did before you were knocked down. I'm choosing to stand taller. I'll probably get kicked down a few more times before this life is through with me, but I can guarantee you I'll never stay on the ground.”

“I love how you aren't weird and awkward, despite the fact that you've been severely cut off from socialization to the point where you make the Amish look trendy.”

“I love being with yo so badWhen we aren't together, I miss you so badOne of these days I'm going to marry you so badand it'll besoso good.”

“Aren't you in my Science class?" Shayna/Shayla asks."English," I correct her.She shoots me a condescending look. "I did speak English," she says defensively. "I said, 'aren't you in my Science class?'"Oh, holy hell. Maybe I don't want to be that blonde. "No," I say. "I meant English as in 'I'm not in your Science class, I'm in your English class'.”

“Karen shuts the back door and turns to me. “You know I trust you, but please…”“Don’t get pregnant,” I interrupt. “I know, I know. You’ve been saying that every time you leave for the past two years. I’m not getting pregnant, Mom. Only terribly high and cracked out.”She laughs and hugs me. “Good girl. And wasted. Don’t forget to get really wasted.”