“Mom?” I say as I slip on my boots. “I know you were only eighteen when you met Dad. I mean, that’s really young to meet the person you spend the rest of your life with. Do you ever regret it?”She doesn’t answer immediately. Instead, she lies back on my bed and clasps her hands behind her head, pondering my question.“I’ve never regretted it. Questioned it? Sure. But never regretted.""Is there a difference?” I ask.“Absolutely. Regret is counterproductive. It’s looking back on a past that you can’t change. Questioning things as they occur can prevent regret in the future. I questioned a lot about my relationship with your father. People make spontaneous decisions based on of their hearts all the time. There’s so much more to relationships than just love.”
Explore This Quote Further
Quote Analysis
In this quote from Colleen Hoover's novel, the protagonist questions her mother about her decision to marry her father at a young age. The mother's response highlights the difference between regret and questioning in relationships, emphasizing the importance of introspection and consideration in decision-making.
The mother's statement that "regret is counterproductive" suggests that dwelling on past decisions can hinder personal growth and progress. Instead, she advocates for actively questioning and evaluating one's choices in the present to avoid future regrets. By acknowledging the complexity of relationships and the need for thoughtful consideration, the mother offers valuable insight into the nature of long-term commitments. This quote serves as a reminder to approach decisions with mindfulness and intention, rather than succumbing to impulsive actions driven solely by emotion.
Modern Relevance:
In this excerpt from Colleen Hoover's work, the character reflects on the complexities of relationships and the importance of questioning decisions rather than regretting them. This theme is highly relevant in today's society, where young people are often faced with the pressure to make quick decisions about their relationships. Let's delve deeper into the significance of this excerpt in a modern context.
"“Mom?” I say as I slip on my boots. “I know you were only eighteen when you met Dad. I mean, that’s really young to meet the person you spend the rest of your life with. Do you ever regret it?”She doesn’t answer immediately. Instead, she lies back on my bed and clasps her hands behind her head, pondering my question.“I’ve never regretted it. Questioned it? Sure. But never regretted.""Is there a difference?” I ask.“Absolutely. Regret is counterproductive. It’s looking back on a past that you can’t change. Questioning things as they occur can prevent regret in the future. I questioned a lot about my relationship with your father. People make spontaneous decisions based on of their hearts all the time. There’s so much more to relationships than just love.” - Colleen Hoover".
Reflections on Love and Regret
"“Mom?” I say as I slip on my boots. “I know you were only eighteen when you met Dad. I mean, that’s really young to meet the person you spend the rest of your life with. Do you ever regret it?” She doesn’t answer immediately. Instead, she lies back on my bed and clasps her hands behind her head, pondering my question.
“I’ve never regretted it. Questioned it? Sure. But never regretted."
"Is there a difference?” I ask.
“Absolutely. Regret is counterproductive. It’s looking back on a past that you can’t change. Questioning things as they occur can prevent regret in the future. I questioned a lot about my relationship with your father. People make spontaneous decisions based on of their hearts all the time. There’s so much more to relationships than just love.” - Colleen Hoover"
Reflection Questions:
In the passage above, a mother shares her perspective on love, relationships, and decision-making with her child. As you reflect on this dialogue, consider the following questions:
Think about a significant relationship in your life. Have you ever questioned it, like the mother in the passage, even if you didn't regret it? How did questioning it impact your decisions and actions?
How do you differentiate between regret and questioning in your own life? How do these concepts influence your outlook on past decisions and future choices?
What do you think the mother means when she says, "There’s so much more to relationships than just love"? How do you interpret this statement in the context of your own relationships and experiences?
Take some time to ponder these questions and consider how they relate to your own thoughts and feelings about love, relationships, and decision-making.
Similar quotes
“I've never regretted it. Questioned it? Sure. But never regretted." "Is there a difference?" I ask. "Absolutely. Regret is counterproductive. It's looking back on a past that you can't change. Questioning things as they occur can prevent regret in the future. I questioned a lot about my relationship with your father. People make spontaneous decisions based off of their hearts all the time. There's so much more to relationships than just love.”
“Regret is counterproductive. It's looking back on a past that you can't change. Questioning things as they occur can prevent regret in the future.”
“To my babies, Merry Christmas. I'm sorry if these letters have caught you both by surprise. There is just so much more I have to say. I know you thought I was done giving advice, but I couldn't leave without reiterating a few things in writing. You may not relate to these things now, but someday you will. I wasn't able to be around forever, but I hope that my words can be. -Don't stop making basagna. Basagna is good. Wait until a day when there is no bad news, and bake a damn basagna. -Find a balance between head and heart. Hopefully you've found that Lake, and you can help Kel sort it out when he gets to that point. -Push your boundaries, that's what they're there for. -I'm stealing this snippet from your favorite band, Lake. "Always remember there is nothing worth sharing, like the love that let us share our name." -Don't take life too seriously. Punch it in the face when it needs a good hit. Laugh at it. -And Laugh a lot. Never go a day without laughing at least once. -Never judge others. You both know good and well how unexpected events can change who a person is. Always keep that in mind. You never know what someone else is experiencing within their own life. -Question everything. Your love, your religion, your passions. If you don't have questions, you'll never find answers. -Be accepting. Of everything. People's differences, their similarities, their choices, their personalities. Sometimes it takes a variety to make a good collection. The same goes for people. -Choose your battles, but don't choose very many. -Keep an open mind; it's the only way new things can get in. -And last but not least, not the tiniest bit least. Never regret. Thank you both for giving me the best years of my life. Especially the last one. Love, Mom”
“You’re so cute when you’re jealous,” I say. She looks at me, her resolve melting with my words. I take her face in my hands and gently press my lips to hers. She sighs a quiet, defeated sigh into my mouth and relents, parting her lips for me. I run my hands down her arms and to her waist, then pull her out of the chair and on top of me as I lean back onto the bed.I place one hand on the small of her back, pressing her into me, and my other hand I run through her hair, grabbing the back of her head. I kiss her hard as I roll her onto her back, proving to her that she has absolutely nothing to be jealous of. As soon as I’m on top of her, she places her hands on my cheeks and forces my face apart from hers.“So your lips touched someone else’s lips? After our first kiss?”I fall back onto the bed beside her. “Lake, stop it. Stop thinking about it,” I say.“I can’t, Will.” She turns to me and makes that damn pouty face she knows I can’t refuse. “I need to know. In my head all I can picture is you taking some girl out on this perfect date and making her grilled cheese sandwiches and playing “would you rather” with her and sharing seriously intense moments with her, then kissing the hell out of her at the end of the night.”Her description of our first date causes me to laugh. I lean over and press my lips to her ear and whisper, “Is that what I did to you? I kissed the hell out of you?”She pulls her neck away and shoots me a glare, letting me know she isn’t backing down until she gets her way. “Fine,” I say, pulling back. “If I tell you all about it will you promise to let me kiss the hell out of you again?”“Promise,” she says.”
“You're in love with her, aren't you?" I pause. Am I? I sign and clasp my hands behind my head, not sure what to say. "I'm trying so hard not to be," I say quietly, admitting it to myself for the first time.”
“Just seeing the smile on her face is enough to keep me satisfied for the rest of my life. Seeing her happy again is better than any feeling in the world. I never want to see her sad again. "This will be worth it, Lake. Everything we had to go through. I promise. Even if you have to wait for me, I'll make it worth it."The smile fades from her eyes and she clutches her hand to her heart. "You already have, Will."That. Right there. I don't deserve her.I walk swiftly back to where she's standing and take her face in my hands. "I mean it," I say. "I love you so damn much, it hurts." I force my lips against hers, then pull away just as fast. "But it hurts in a really good way.”