“When you have wit of your own, it's a pleasure to credit other people for theirs.”

“It's delicious to have people adore you, but it's exhausting, too. Particularly when your own feelings don't match theirs.”

“Witnessing the pain of others is the very least you can do in this world. It's how you know that when your own turn comes, someone will be there with you.”

“Stupidity is to have amnesia over your own faults when the person you hate makes theirs.”

“Great minds discuss ideas. Average minds discuss events. Small minds discuss other people. Life's too short to worry about what other people do or don't do. Tend your own backyard, not theirs, because yours is the one you have to live in.”

“It's really hard to be roomates with people if your suitcases are much better than theirs--if yours are the really good ones and theirs aren't. You think if they're intelligent and all, the other person, and have a good sense of humor, that they don't give a damn whose suitcases are better, but they do. They really do.”