“The students’ announcements were lengthy – the longer roll call was, the shorter first period would be – and filled with double entendres: Boys’ soccer is practicing on Coates Field today, which, if you don’t know where it is, is behind the headmaster’s house, and if you still don’t know where it is, ask Fred. Where are you, Fred? You wanna raise your hand, man? There’s Fred, everyone see Fred? Okay, so Coates Field. And remember – bring your balls.”

“When we were in Diagon Alley,' Harry began, but Mr. Weasley forstalled him with a grimace.Am I about to discover where you, Ron, and Hermione disappeared to while you were supposed to be in the back room of Fred and George's shop?'How did you...?'Harry, please. You're talking to the man who raised Fred and George.”

“Fred, you next," the plump woman said. "I'm not Fred, I'm George," said the boy. "Honestly, woman, you call yourself our mother? Can't you tell I'm George?" "Sorry, George, dear." "Only joking, I am Fred," said the boy and off he went.”

“Well," Fred said. "Gotta go. You two come by for dinner soon. I'll barbecue something."Where Fred was concerned, that probably meant he'd shoot something first, then barbecue it, but that was fine by Tony. He'd eat barbecued yak if it meant being a part of this family”

“Harry!" said Fred, elbowing Percy out of the way and bowing deeply. "Simply splendid to see you, old boy-""Marvelous," said George, pushing Fred aside and seizing Harry's hand in turn. "Absolutely spiffing."Percy scowled."That's enough, now," said Mrs. Weasley."Mum!" said Fred as though he'd only just spotted her and seizing her hand too. "How really corking to see you-”

“Fred: "Is that brick wall your boyfriend?"Doug: "Only in my dreams."Fred: "Oh, you too? I'm Fred."Doug: "Doug. I should mention, in all fairness though that Christy's boyfriend is my best friend. He's the brick wall you should be worried about.”