“Because I live in the real world where vampires burn in the sun.”

“Why don't you sparkle?"-"Because I live in the real world, where vampires burst into flames.”

“Where I'm living is not a storybook world. It's the real world, full of gaps and inconsistencies and anticlimaxes.”

“When I got older I decided I wanted to be a real writer. I tried to write about real things. I wanted to describe the world, because to live in an undescribed world was too lonely.”

“Vampires? You think vampires are real? Seriously?""The werewolf is asking me if I believe in vampires?”

“A great numb feeling washes over me as I let go of the past and look forward to the future. Pretend to be a vampire. I don't really need to pretend, because it's who I am, an emotional vampire. I've just come to expect it. Vampires are real. That I was born this way. That I feed off of other people's real emotions. Search for this night's prey. Who will it be?”