“Jesus, Jeff. What happened to your head? You look like you got attacked by a beaver.”

“Jeff shook his head, the lines between his brows drawing together. “Ask yourself this, Connor— what is it that’s got your manties in such a twist? I mean, really... what is it about Megan you don’t want to lose?”

“You always look so cool, like no matter what happens, it’s got nothing to do with you, but you’re not really like that. In your own way, you’re out there fighting as hard as you can, even if other people can’t tell by looking at you.”

“What happened to your face?""What happened to yours?" I retorted. "You look like a damn Oompa Loompa. You should lay off the spray tanning, Lea.”

“Jeff: Are you married?Bubba J.: Yep.Jeff: Your wife pretty?Bubba J.: Ye... no!Jeff: What's the difference?Bubba J.: The light.”

“What do I do? (Jeff)Well, not to insult a man who looks like a rocket scientist in comparison to you, but…run, Forrest, run. (Rafael)”