“This is like a cookie, it tastes like a cookie having sex with a doughnut.”

“We laughed the rest of the way, because the point of this story is, it is not the cookies. It is the love.”

“Chestnuts in stuffing tastes like someone chewed up a tree branch and then French-kissed it into your mouth.”

“How wrong to think I was anyone else, like thinking grass stains make you a beautiful view, like getting kissed makes you kissable, like feeling warm makes you coffee, like liking movies makes you a director. How utterly incorrect to think it any other way, a box of crap is treasures, a boy smiling means it, a gentle moment is a life improved.”

“Love can smack you like a seagull, and pour all over your feet like junk mail.”

“Temptations are like dirty dishes.  There are some who leave them alone, scarcely noticing how many have piled up.  And there are some who must do them right away.”

“I liked, I admit, that we didn’t pretend there hadn’t been other girls. There was always a girl on you in the halls at school, like they came free with a backpack.”