“Wait, what are you doing?” She could apparently hear the strain in my voice as I craned my neck from side to side. “I’m trying to see past a little girl on my hood."“Oh. Isn’t that dangerous?” “Normally. But she has a knife.” “Oh, well, then, I guess it’s okay.”

“Quickly ducking, I fall to the ground while taking grip on the table. Hearing the axe get stuck into the wall on the other side, I slyly crane my neck to see what he was going to do next.”

“So," she says, "What's got you so busy?""What?" he says, "Oh, um, I was trying to perfect my telepathy." Grace gasps and bulges her eyes out very wide. "Are…you okay?" he asks, finally, after she shows no signs of stopping."I'm pushing a thought towards you, obviously.""Oh," Kellan says, "Well I guess I'm not a telepath after all.”

“You don’t understand.She was mean to me. Very mean. And she’s dangerous. A very dangerous girl. I’m your guardian, Ayden. I have to protect you!It’s my sworn duty. My sworn duty!”“Protect me?”“Yes!” Pearl hovered frantically in front of “her boy,” and slathered her voice with disgust. “She threatened to…” Oh, she wouldn’t.“Kiss you!”She would. My cheeks fired. I stared at the floor.Ayden laughed. “Kiss me?”“Yeeeeesss,” Pearl wailed in agony. “She promised a big juicy kiss! On a real date. No pretending. With hand holding and—and cuddling!”And I thought it couldn’t get any worse.”

“I guess he sees the mortified look on my face-Can I get a little bedside manner here?-because he awkwardly pats the sides of my arms and tried to smile.”

“Oh, but my stomach, she is like a waterbed covered in flannel. When I lie on my side in bed, my stomach lies politely beside me, like a puppy.”