“When you’re meeting a whole lot of new people and having to do things you’re in—I’m in a constant low-level state of anxiety. Which produces adrenaline, and kind of shuts down—there’s a difference between short-term, people-based anxiety. And sort of deep, existential, you know, fear, that you feel all the way down to your butthole. And that, I, that’s…that’s what I’ll have when I’m alone.”

“You know, you’re a little complicated after all.” “Oh no,” she assured him hastily. “No, I’m not really - I’m just a - I’m just a whole lot of different simple people.”

“This kind of thing is so awkward and horrible, and from your end, you know it must… Okay, I’m just going to come out and tell you: I’m asking you out. That’s what I’m doing. Please don’t answer yet, because I know you might have a “No” queued up in your head already, but will you please let me say a few things? I know that being a woman in New York must be hard, because it’s basically disappointing that you try to be nice to men as human beings, and then they respond by just torpedoing to your vagina. And I want you to know that I’m aware that you’re young and beautiful - and I’m not… either of those things. And part of me knows that as soon as my lips stop moving, you’re going to say no. But please think of the fact that it’s low risk what I’m asking. You just come out with me for a drink, and even if you got up in the middle of the one drink, I wouldn’t hold it against you. Just make a judgement based on nothing horrible would happen if you came out with me. I think you’re so attractive. I’m attracted to you because you’re nice, and you’re a decent person, and those are probably the reasons you want people to be attracted to you, right? Also, you’re horribly cute. I mean, you’re cute as hell. And I grow on people - women. Some times go by, and you get past the bald head and that I sweat a lot and I’m lumpy… I’ve run out of things to say. Can you just tell me now? Did this work?”

“I’m not pretending this is anything more than a short-term relationship, but I like being with you even when there’s no sex involved. That means you’re not a booty call.”

“Whiskey was still looking some place past Patrick’s shoulder, and suddenly his brown eyes metPatrick’s with a sort of inscrutable intensity. “Patrick, this isn’t over, okay? You and me? You want tostay here, you want to keep sleeping in my bed, that’s fine. I like you there. You’re warm and you’re kind,and it’s comfortable, having you there. But I’m going to want you, and you’re going to want me, and if youdon’t want to follow through on that, that’s fine too. But you’ll need to decide which way you want it, andyou need to make it clear when you make your decision. I’m, like, twelve years older than you, and I don’tsleep around. I’m not going to hit on you just because you’re cute and you’re here. I need to know it’ssomething you want, and it’s something you need, and you’re not just doing it because you think you needto put out because I’m being human to you. You don’t. All you need to do is be human back.”

“Love is a funny thing; there’s the kind that’s like you’re five and you’re looking up at your Mum’s face as she reads you a bedtime story.Then there’s the kind that makes you nervous and twists in your stomach.Then there’s the kind that makes you feel like you’re holding everything of worth in your hands.”