“I can teach you to jump up in five seconds-it takes years to learn how to land properly.”
“Reach up to the feet of God, looking for a sign...it was right here all the time...”
“Money can't buy happiness but it can buy a huge yacht that sails right next to it.”
“I used to have a drug problem, now I make enough money.”
“I don't feel tardy.”
“I used to jog but the ice cubes kept falling out of my glass. ”
“It's not rocket surgery!”