“recant, v.I want to take back at least half of the “I love you”s, because I didn’t mean them as much as the other ones. I want to take back the book of artsy photos I gave you, because you didn’t get it and said it was hipster trash. I want to take back what I said about you being an emotional zombie. I want to take back the time I called you “honey” in front of your sister and you looked like I had just shown her pictures of us having sex. I want to take back the wineglass I broke when I was mad, because it was a nice wineglass and the argument would have ended anyway. I want to take back the time we had sex in a rent-a-car, not because I feel bad about the people who got in the car after us, but because it was massively uncomfortable. I want to take back the trust I had while you were away in Austin. I want to take back the time I said you were a genius, because I was being sarcastic and I should have just said you’d hurt my feelings. I want to take back the secrets I told you so I can decide now whether to tell them to you again. I want to take back the piece of me that lies in you, to see if I truly miss it. I want to take back at least half the “I love you”s, because it feels safer that way.”

“I want to take back the secrets I told you so I can decide now whether to tell them to you again. I want to take back the piece of me that lies in you, to see if I truly miss it. I want to take back at least half the “I love you”s, because it feels safer that way.”

“I want to take back at least half the “I love you”s, because it feels safer that way.”

“I want to take back at least half of the “I love you”s, because I didn’t mean them as much as the other ones.”

“All that doesn’t matter. All that stuff I did before was just sex. I told you, I don’t want to have sex with you. I want to do more. You deserve so much more. More than me anyway.”“What if I don’t want more? What if I just want you?” All of my feelings and frustrations had finally spilled out of my mouth.“I take it back. That was the sexiest thing you’ve ever said.”

“When I say, "Be my lover", I don't mean, "Let's have an affair." I don't mean "Sleep with me." I don't mean, "Be my secret." I want us to go back down to that root. I want you to be the one who loves me. I want to be the one who loves you.”

“I love you,” she says.“I love you,” I say.And then we hang up, because nothing else needs to be said after that.I want to give Zara her life back. Even if I feel I deserve something like this, I don’t deserve it at her expense.”