“there's no such thing as a fuck cure. a fuck cure is like the adult version of santa claus”

“This Santa's beard was real, and so was his hair. He wasn't fucking around.”

“i will admit there's a certain degree of giving a fuck that goes into not giving a fuck. by saying you don't care if the world falls apart, in some small way you're saying you want it to stay together, on your terms.”

“Fuck this.Fuck this wondering. Fuck this trying and trying. Fuck this belief that two people can become one ideal. Fuck this helplessness. Fuck this waiting for something to happen that probably won't ever happen.”

“I am having a fucking great time, and the amazing thing is that I realize it even as it's happening.”

“She's cinematic and I'm a fucking sitcom.”

“You haven’t missed me for one fucking minute. You have never for one single second in your entire pathetic fucking life missed me. You might have missed fucking with my head, and you might have missed the satisfaction you so clearly got from demolishing me, but those are your emotions you’re missing, not mine. I’m afraid I can’t help you.”