“Ianto Jones was at his station behind the run-down Tourist Information Centre that served at a front to the clandestine goings on in Torchwood. His bare feet were on his desk, his tie slumped like a crestfallen snake next to an open pizza box, the top two buttons of his shirt undone."Taking it easy, I see?" said Jack, stepping out through the security door that led into the Hub itself. "Well at least someone has the right idea. Whatcha doing there, Sport?""Sport?" said Ianto. "Not sure I like 'Sport' as a term of endearment. 'Sexy is good, if unimaginative. 'Pumpkin' is a bit much, but 'Sport'? No. You'll have to think of another one."Okay, Tiger Pants. Whatcha doing?"Ianto laughed."I..." he said, pausing to swallow a mouthful of pizza, "am having a James Bondathon.""A what?""A James Bondathon. I'm watching my favourite James Bond films in chronological order.""You're a Bond fan?""Oh yes. He's the archetypal male fantasy, isn't he? The man all women want to have, and all men want to be.""Are you sure it's not the other way around?”

“The philosopher Sir James Mackintosh had said that the powers of a man's mind were proportionate to the quantity of coffee he drank, and Voltaire had knocked back fifty cups of it a day, so Ianto reckoned there had to be something in it. And saving Cardiff from the kinds of things that came through the Rift called for quick, inspired thinking, so Ianto took it upon himself to make sure the coffee was good. Ianto Jones, saving the world with a dark roast.”

“Statistics show that men are interested in three things: careers, sports, and sex. That's why they love professional cheerleaders."Cal put down his fork "Well, that's sexist.""Yes i know," she said. "But it's true isn't it?""What?" Cal tried to find his place in the conversation. "Oh, the sports and sex thing? Not at all. This is the twenty-first century. We've learned how to be sensitive.""You have?""Sure," Cal said. "Otherwise we wouldn't get laid.”

“You're going to pay for that Pet,' he panted. The right side of his face sported an angry red hand print.I shook out my hand, 'I already have. That was my change.”

“I rolled my eyes at his exuberance. “I have an older brother,” I said. “He got all the sports knowledge. I learned how to bake cookies.”

“You do not interrupt a man when he is explaining his master plan after having been soundly defeated. Don't you watch any James Bond Movies?”