“Today a child told Santa Ken that he wanted his dead father back and a complete set of Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. Everyone wants those Turtles.”

“Either he was suffering a terrible case of gas or he had a pint-size child practicing the trumpet in his back pocket.”

“Pandora, meet my brothers, Leonardo and Michelangelo.""Like the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles?" she couldn't resist asking."Like the Renaissance painters," Leo snapped. He exchanged a snarl with his twin brother. "I seriously hate those damned turtles.”

“Snowball just leads elves on, elves and Santas. He is playing a dangerous game. ”

“On a busy day twenty-two thousand people come to visit Santa, and I was told that it is an elf's lot to remain merry in the face of torment and adversity. I promised to keep that in mind.”

“Everyone looks retarded once you set your mind to it.”

“Maybe. Although I doubt most Shadowhunters get a tattoo of Donatello from the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles on their left shoulder. ”