“I'm not sure if I know any 'functional' families, if functional means a family without difficult times and members who don't have a full range of problems.”

“We deny the severity of our loved one's problem not because we are naive, but because we can't know.”

“Anyone who has lived through it, or those who are now living through it, knows that caring about an addict is as complex and fraught and debilitating as addiction itself.”

“I know there is no point in haranguing him because he will just shut down, but I want to cover every angle.”

“Jasper, who is six, is the only one of us who responds appropriately. He wails, inconsolable for an hour.”

“He had black fingernails and drove a hearse. Everything about him cried out, 'Look at me, look at me,' and when you looked at him, he would snap, 'Who the fuck are you looking at?' If you subscribe to the idea that addiction is a disease, it is startling to see how many of these children- paranoid, anxious, bruised, tremulous, withered, in some cases psychotic - are seriously ill, slowly dying. We'd never allow such a scene if these kids had any other disease. They would be in a hospital, not on the streets.”

“At my worst, I even resented Nic because an addict, at least when high, has a momentary respite from his suffering. There is no similar relief for parents or children or husbands or wives or others who love them.”