“It weighed down on me like a rucksack filled with dog turds.”

“She stares at him, standing with a group of people by the five-metre high chocolate fountain”

“...and - holy shit was this song bad. It was like the singer was stabbing my ear with a dagger made of dried turds.”

“You are but a hard turd in the ass of my journey.”

“Believe me, Athelstan, you can wrap a dog's turd in a cloth of gold but it remains a dog's turd.”

“The unwarranted devotion. Putting up with the fear of being with the wrong person because you can't deal with the fear of being alone. The hope tinged with doubt, and the doubt tinged with hope. Every time I see these feelings in someone else's face, it weighs me down.”

“It felt as if I was suddenly walking around in wet socks, weighing my feet down as if two kids were sitting on my feet with their legs wrapped around mine.”