“The phrase 'sodomized by a bratwurst poltergeist' suddenly flew through my mind.”

“There is no word in the English language for the feeling someone gets when they suddenly realize they're standing next to an unholy monster impersonating a human. Monstralization, maybe?”

“The man walked past me and stopped, observing the blood running down my neck."Your injury. Let us tend to it." He looked out through the open doorway and silently gestured to someone out there. "Our world," he said, "is far more advanced than yours. For reasons you'll understand shortly."A thin, bony, naked woman entered the room, carrying two small, white kittens. She sat one of the fluffy cats in my lap and stuffed the other down my shirt. She turned and left."There," said the large man. "The kittens will make your sad go away.”

“Cops do this every day, rifling closets and digging through your dildo drawer.”

“Folding chairs were flying through the air as if propelled by dozens of invisible Bobby Knights.”

“You see, Frank found out the hard way that the dark things lurking in the night don’t haunt old houses or abandoned ships. They haunt minds.”

“I call it Dante’s Syndrome,” John said. I had never heard him call it any such thing.“Meaning I think Dave and I gained the ability to peer into Hell. Only it turns out Hell is righthere, it’s all through us and around us and in us like the microbes that swarm through yourlungs and guts and veins. Hey, look! An owl!”We all looked. It was an owl, all right.”