“I lend you a thousand bucks to pay for a date with myself. I let you talk me into wearing a damn tuxedo. The least you could do is hold my hand.' - Paul van Dorn”

“If the injustice is part of the necessary friction of the machine of government, let it go, let it go: perchance it will wear smooth--certainly the machine will wear out… but if it is of such a nature that it requires you to be the agent of injustice to another, then I say, break the law. Let your life be a counter-friction to stop the machine. What I have to do is to see, at any rate, that I do not lend myself to the wrong which I condemn.”

“If you wanted me to take a shower, you should have payed me ten bucks like you usually do!”

“What are you guys doing? If you anted me to take a shower, all you had to do was pay me ten bucks, like you usually do”

“Billy squinted at me. "Why are you letting them go?""Because they're real.""How do you know?""The one I was holding crapped on my hand.”

“I make conversation like I make love to myself—I let my hands do all the talking.”