“You make a good point,' Fletcher conceded. 'See, there's a reason why you're the girl and I'm the boy. You think about things while I...''Don't?''Exactly,' he said happily.”
“I love you.''Yeah, well...''You make my heart want to beat.''That's nice and creepy. But I'm with Fletcher.(...) Also, these proclamations of your undying love for me are getting kind of... it's a bit much to be honest. Just hold back a little.''But my love for you is eternal.''That's exactly the kind of thing I'm talking about.”
“Skulduggery.""Fletcher."Fletcher stuck out his hand. Skulduggery observed it for a moment."I'm sorry, what are we doing now?""Shaking hands," Fletcher said. "Like adults. I just want you to know that this past year has changed me. I've grown, as a person. I'm not the same Fletcher you used to know."You look a lot like him.""Well, yeah, but-""And you have the same ridiculous hair.""Can we just shake hands?""Of course we can," Skulduggery said, and they shook. "Now what?""I, uh...I don't really know. What do adults usually do after they shake hands?""Generally, the first thing they do is let go.""Oh, right," Fletcher said, and Skulduggery took his hand back. "So, Skulduggery, how have you been? You're looking well. That's a really nice tie."It's blue.""And such a nice shade."Skulduggery looked at Valkyrie. "You promised me he wouldn't be annoying.”
“Can I just point something out?" Fletcher asked. "That is an awful plan. On a scale of one to ten - the Trojan War being a ten and General Custer verus all those Indians being a one - your plan is a zero. I don't think it is a plan at all. I think it's just a series of happenings that are, to be honest, unlikely to follow on from each other in the way in which everyone's probably hoping.""Do you have a better plan?" Valkyrie asked."Of course not. I'm a man of action, not thought."Valkyrie nodded. "You're definitely not a man of thought.""Why are you in charge anyway? What do you know about organising something like this?""I have faith," Tanith said."As do I," said Ghastly.Valkyrie smiled at them gratefully. "So you think the plan will work?""God, no," said Ghastly."Sorry, Val," said Tanith”
“Fletcher appeared beside her. He peered at the baby. "Can it do any tricks yet?""I'm still working on it. Want to hold her?""God, no," Fletcher said laughing. "I'd drop it.""It's not an it, it's my baby sister. Go on, hold her. You won't make a mess of it, i swear. Only an idiot could drop a baby.""You always say I am an idiot.""But you're a special kind of idiot. Here."She passed Alice into his arms, and he stood there, rigid, a look of intense concentration on his face.”
“Where are you going?""Nowhere special. I just have some... things to do.""Why did you pause?'"I'm sorry?""You paused. You have 'some... things to do.'"No reason, I just--""You're up to something.""No--""Then why'd you pause?""Get in the car."She got in. He got in."Seat belt," he said.Why'd you pause?"His head drooped. "Because I'm up to somthing.""And why can't I come with you?""Because it's something sneaky.""Do you promise to tell me later?""I do.""Well all right then." She clicked her seat belt into place. "Let's go.”
“You want to see safe hands?' her dad asked. He went to the fruit bowl on the side of the table, took two apples and proceeded to juggle them. 'See? Safe as anything.' 'Are you proposing you juggle our newborn child?''Of course not,' he said. 'I'd only be able to juggle her if you'd had twins. Otherwise it would just be throwing.'(...) 'From this moment on, I will be the best father the world has ever seen. Wifey, may I please hold my child?' Valkyrie's mum looked at him suspiciously. 'When you hold a baby, what's the most important thing to remember?''Not to drop it,' he said proudly.'Well, yes, well done dear, but I was thinking more about how you hold the baby.''Ah,' he said, 'Of course. The secret to holding a baby is to pick it up by the scruff of its neck.''You're thinking of kittens.''Pick it up by the ears, then.''You're thinking of nothing.' 'Can I please just hold her?''I don't think that's wise.' 'A lot of things aren't wise, Melissa. Is crossing the road with your eyes closed wise? No, but I do it anyway.'His wife nodded. 'Stephanie, you are in charge of teaching Alice how to cross the road.”