“I was not dressed crazily - I was dressed as a horse. And for a very logical and sane reason.”

“He raised one eyebrow. Infuriatingly. Then he looked me up and down, but not in a meaningful way like Jake used to, more as if i was a horse, which was weird because he hadn't yesterday when i was actually dressed as one.”

“I love watching people's faces when i say i live with my daughter and Johnny Depp.”

“I would have to hide in the jungle and live wild amoung the pandas”

“...OMGOMGOMG she knows about spanners - SHE KNOWS I PICTURED RALPH'S SPANNER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”

“Oh.My. Every illegal swear word in the dictionary, God. What is it with older men? don't they ever look in the mirror?”

“Daniel Craig is sitting on a carrot, Jude Law is sitting on Daniel Craig's head.”