“Women eat ice-cream, men toast marshmallows.”

“Eliza got vanilla ice cream with butterscotch sauce, whipped cream, and a cherry. She asked me to get chocolate ice cream with hot fudge and marshmallows. This way, she explained, we could share without overlapping flavors. Except she was pretty goddamn stingy with hers. She only gave me one bite. Meanwhile I was supposed to let her eat half of mine.”

“I held up my ice-cream cone in the gesture of a toast. "Number thirteen: Eat ice cream in public."About this one... I don't get it. What's the big deal about eating ice cream?"Fat people aren't allowed to eat in public."What are you talking about?" she said, a bit snobbily in my opinion. "I notice them eating all the time."Exactly."You lost me."It's hard to enjoy the eating experience when you feel everyone's staring at you, thinking, No wonder she's such a fat cow. Look how she eats."I don't think that!"Sure.”

“We are going to eat ice cream and we are going to eat shit. The trick is to use different spoons.”

“EATABLE MARSHMALLOW PILLOWS LICKABLE WALLPAPER FOR NURSERIES HOT ICE CREAMS FOR COLD DAYS COWS THAT GIVE CHOCOLATE MILK FIZZY LIFTING DRINKS SQUARE SWEETS THAT LOOK ROUND”

“I think choosing between men and women is like choosing between cake and ice cream. You'd be daft not to try both when there are so many different flavors.”