“The cheesecake was smooth and lush, with the personality of a warm and well-to-do uncle who knows a hundred dirty jokes and will die of sexual exertions in the arms of his mistress.”

“A purple African violet so lush and fleshy it looked edible... his fingers as cool and smooth as beach stones.”

“There is a difference between him who claspeth his mistress in his arms, and him whose eyes are fixed on the door expecting her.”

“Uncle Jeb," we croaked in surprise. "You found us.""Well, now," he said, and his gruff voice brought back a hundred memories. "Well, now, here's a pickle.”

“I’m your uncle?”Oh. So that’s what was bothering him. Izzy could have done a lot of things at this moment to assuage Eibhear’s annoyance. A lot of things.She didn’t do any of them.Instead she said, “Well…you are my uncle.” She brushed a bit of nonexistent dirt off his bare shoulder. “And I was your ward until years later when you finally had your vile, dirty uncle way with me.””Izzy.”

“Well, let me tell you something, Caveman. You are here on account of one person. If it wasn't for that person, you wouldn't be here digging holes in the hot sun. You know who that person is?""My no-good-dirty-rotten-pig-stealing-great-great-grandfather.”